I guess she would know, right?

Michelle, who appears on the cover of Glamour magazine this month, has a few choice pieces of advice when it comes to settling down with a partner.

“Cute’s good. But cute only lasts for so long, and then it’s, ‘Who are you as a person?’ “Don’t look at the bankbook or the title. Look at the heart. Look at the soul. When you’re dating a man, you should always feel good. … You shouldn’t be in a relationship with somebody who doesn’t make you completely happy and make you feel whole.”

The magazine is out on newsstands now.

This week on The Huffington Post, self-proclaimed “personal strength” expert Marcus Buckingham shares with us pearls of wisdom from a select group of women living their best life, as Oprah would say.  These women are living what they describe as full, satisfying lives, finding that balance between career and children, personal and professional, and are now sharing with HuffPo’s readers what they’ve learned.

I’ve heard from many people that mentors have been instrumental in shaping their lives, offering personal and professional advice that changed their course of action dramatically.  Having never had a mentor, I really appreciate when another woman takes the time to share her experiences with me.  I strongly believe that through listening and learning from each other we can shorten our learning curve and exponentially increase our chances of success.

“In the course of our research for Find Your Strongest Life, we interviewed many women who had been extraordinarily successful, and had created a fulfilling, satisfying life. These interviews were wide-ranging, vivid and punchy. In my last couple of posts, I have described the “catch-and-cradle” approach to life shared by many of these women. In this post, I’m going to draw directly from the women themselves. Here are four of the most distinctive pieces of advice that were shared….”

Read the rest of the article here: “Words of Wisdom From Strong Women”

What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?

Since our (previously mentioned) Forums coup is still raging, I thought I would introduce the latest member of That Happened to Me here, and use this opportunity to share her story.  She needs help.  She is not suddenly single, but in the midst of what sounds like a post-breakup identity crisis - a phase all too familiar to those of us who exited unhealthy relationships and began the path to self-discovery and re-definition.  Defining who you are when you are no longer part of a couple can be confusing and disheartening, as it often doesn’t happen overnight and certainly not without asking some tough questions.  But it can also be exhilarating and empowering when your true self starts to emerge and new path starts to unfold.  So ladies, let’s show “Beezy” how it’s done:

“I cannot continue to live my life the way I have been.”

“When I was 17 and about to graduate high school, I met a guy. We were together for a little more than four years, but the relationship was tumultuous (to say the least). He started relationships with several females while we were together, and had sex with three of them. Instead of leaving, I stayed because he convinced me that he would change. By the time I finally ended it I was 23 and had completely lost who I was as a person. I had gone from high school to house wife, and never really learned to grow up and take care of myself. I moved to another state to start school, and soon after found out he married my best friend. It has been four years since the relationship ended- I have not been in a relationship or had sex since, and I have only kissed three men. I try to talk to men, but I quickly lose interest and stop talking to them before anything can get physical. What started out as a voluntary hiatus from the dating world has turned into a permanent complex. I don’t know where to start or how to move forward. I get very uncomfortable meeting men and the few I have were forced upon me by friends who thought they were helping.

What advice do you have for me?”

This post comes courtesy of writer/blogger Stephanie Klein:

“I know you’re hurting. I know that pain, the intensity of it. I totally know.  I need to tell you this: advice is what you want when you already know the answer. And you do. You know the answer. You just don’t like the answer, and that’s understandable.

Intellectually, you know all of it. You know the advice you’d give a friend describing your exact situation. You know what your younger self would tell you to do. Intellectually you know that the pain will eventually dull, that there will be someone else, that you can move on, but in the living, you want time to fast-forward to “over it.” You don’t want to live through it. It’s too painful. You want to feel better, even if it means a band-aid. And yet, you never want to go through this pain again. You want to do anything you can to prevent this from happening again. And the sad fact is, you can’t.”

To read the rest of this amazingly on-target post about the reality of breakups, go here:

http://stephanieklein.blogs.com/greek_tragedy/